A Gen X guide to keeping the faith when everything seems to be falling apart

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When Your Faith Playlist Skips a Track

Remember when we'd carefully arrange songs on our mixtapes, only to have the tape player eat our masterpiece? Life has a way of doing that to our perfectly planned existence too. One minute you're cruising along to the rhythm of your five-year plan, and the next, you're frantically trying to salvage what's left of your expectations with a pencil jammed into the cassette wheel of life.

As a fellow Gen Xer who grew up with one foot in the analog world and another in the digital revolution, I've had my share of faith-testing moments. The kind where you look up at the sky and ask, "Seriously, God? This was the plan?" Maybe you're nodding along right now, or perhaps you're too tired from juggling your teenager's emotional rollercoaster, your aging parents' needs, your middle management position that seems increasingly precarious, and that persistent knee pain that appeared on your 45th birthday.

Welcome to the club. We're the generation that was promised the American Dream but got student loan debt and housing crises instead. We were told to work hard, and everything would fall into place. Yet here we are, working harder than ever, wondering why the puzzle pieces of life don't quite fit together anymore.

But here's the thing about us Gen Xers – we're resilient. We survived dial-up internet, after all. And our faith, much like our fashion choices from the '90s, might occasionally be questionable but ultimately has staying power.

When Your Faith Status Updates to "It's Complicated"

Remember how simple faith seemed when we were younger? Sunday School answers were straightforward: Jesus loves you, be kind to others, don't eat the communion grape juice before the prayer. But somewhere between MTV actually playing music videos and becoming the parents ourselves, faith got... complicated.

The Bible tells us in Proverbs 3:5-6, "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." Great verse, right? Except when your path feels less "straight" and more like you're trying to navigate a maze designed by a sadistic game show host.

Let's be honest about what we're dealing with:

• The career you dedicated decades to suddenly feels meaningless
• Your marriage needs more maintenance than your first car did
• Your kids are either not talking to you or talking too much (about things you don't understand)
• Your body is betraying you in new and exciting ways
• Your parents are aging, and roles are reversing faster than you can process
• Your faith, once a source of comfort, now raises more questions than it answers

Sound familiar? I thought so.

The Spiritual Equivalent of Adjusting Rabbit Ears on a TV

Remember fiddling with those ridiculous TV antennas, moving them micrometers at a time until the picture cleared? Sometimes reconnecting with God feels just as frustrating and technical. You know the signal is out there, but for some reason, all you're getting is static.

James 4:8 tells us, "Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you." But what happens when you're trying to draw near and God seems to have stepped out for a cosmic coffee break?

When Lisa, a 53-year-old marketing executive, lost her job after 15 years with the same company, her faith flatlined. "I did everything right," she told me. "I prayed, I tithed, I volunteered. And then, poof! My career vanished in a corporate restructuring. Where was God in that decision?"

For six months, Lisa couldn't pray. Couldn't open her Bible. Couldn't even walk into church without feeling a burning resentment. Her faith antenna wasn't just misaligned; it had snapped off completely.

"What finally changed things wasn't some spiritual epiphany," she said. "It was running into my former boss at the grocery store. He'd lost his job too, just a month after I did. We ended up talking in the frozen food aisle for an hour. He told me he'd started a consulting business and needed a marketing partner. That partnership saved my financial life, but the conversation saved my faith. I realized God hadn't abandoned me; He was just rerouting me."

When Your Faith Feels Like That AOL Dial-Up Sound

Painfully slow, full of screeching noises, and you're never quite sure if a connection will actually happen? Yep, that's faith in the middle of life's chaos.

The Apostle Paul, who knew a thing or two about life not going as planned, wrote in Romans 8:28, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." That verse used to be comforting. Now it might make you want to throw something.

Because when you're watching your retirement fund dwindle, or your marriage crumble, or your health deteriorate, it's hard to see how any of it is "working for good."

Mark, a 49-year-old teacher and father of three, hit his faith crisis when his wife was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. "I'd been a Christian since I was a kid," he said. "I taught Sunday School, led Bible studies, the whole package. But when Sarah got sick, all those easy answers evaporated. I was so angry at God. I'd bargain with Him—take me instead, do whatever you want with me, just heal her. But that's not how it worked out."

Mark's faith didn't disappear, but it transformed. "I had to let go of the God who fixes everything and meet the God who walks through everything. Some days, that's still really hard to accept."

Practical Steps for When Your Faith Is Running on Windows 95

When your spiritual life is crashing more frequently than outdated software, it's time for an upgrade. Here are some practical steps that don't require you to plaster on a fake smile or pretend everything's fine when it clearly isn't:

1. Reboot Your Prayer Life

Remember how we used to have to shut down our computers completely when they froze? Sometimes prayer needs the same approach. If your standard prayers feel hollow or routine, try a complete reboot:

• Ditch the religious language and talk to God like you'd talk to a friend at a coffee shop
• Try praying while walking instead of sitting still (perfect for us fidgety Gen Xers)
• Write your prayers down, uncensored and raw
• Use the Psalms as templates—they're full of complaints, questions, and even anger

Psalm 13:1-2 starts with, "How long, LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart?" If David could ask God "How long?" then so can we.

2. Find Your Faith Tribe

No, not the perfectly polished church people who make you feel inadequate. I'm talking about finding people who are as confused and frustrated as you are, but still showing up.

When Jeff, a 54-year-old software developer, lost his son to an overdose, his church small group didn't know what to do with his grief. "People kept giving me books about heaven and God's plan," he said. "But I didn't need theology. I needed space to scream and question and doubt."

Jeff eventually found that space in a grief support group that happened to meet at a different church. "Half the people there weren't even Christians, but they were more honest about suffering than anyone I'd met. And strangely, I found God there—in the questions, in the anger, in the solidarity of shared pain."

Jesus himself sought out community during his darkest moments. In the Garden of Gethsemane, he asked his friends to stay awake with him, to share in his anguish. He knew the power of not being alone.

3. Declutter Your Faith

Marie Kondo your spiritual life. Which religious obligations actually bring you closer to God, and which ones just add to your exhaustion? Which church activities give you life, and which ones make you want to fake a stomach bug to get out of attending?

Jesus was pretty clear about religious burdens in Matthew 11:28-30: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

If your faith feels more like a crushing weight than a source of strength, something's wrong—and it's probably not you.

4. Create a Faith Mixtape

Just like we used to carefully curate songs that spoke to our teenage angst, create a collection of Bible passages, quotes, podcast episodes, or songs that speak to your current struggle. The key is authenticity—choose things that actually resonate, not just what you think should be inspiring.

My own faith mixtape includes:

• Psalm 73, where Asaph basically admits he's jealous of shallow, wealthy people who don't seem to have any problems
• The entire book of Ecclesiastes, which is basically the Bible's version of existential crisis
• U2's "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" (because Bono gets it)
• A prayer by Thomas Merton that begins, "My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going..."

5. Give Yourself Permission to Be a Work in Progress

Remember when the "Under Construction" GIF was on every website? Your faith is allowed to have that sign too.

In Philippians 1:6, Paul writes, "Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Notice he doesn't say the work is finished. We're all under construction, all in process.

Denise, a 47-year-old nurse, described her faith journey as "taking the scenic route."

"I was raised to believe that faith was a straight line," she said. "You accept Jesus, you grow consistently, you have minor setbacks but generally trend upward. My actual experience has been more like a Jackson Pollock painting—messy, seemingly random, but somehow forming a cohesive whole that only makes sense when you step back and see the bigger picture."

When Life Hands You Lemons and You've Misplaced the Juicer

Remember when we thought we'd have it all figured out by now? Weren't our 40s and 50s supposed to be the decades of stability and wisdom? Instead, many of us feel like we've been thrown into some cosmic blender.

The midlife faith crisis is real, and it's not a sign of spiritual failure. In fact, it might be exactly where God is doing His best work.

Richard Rohr, a Franciscan priest and author, suggests that life consists of two halves. The first half is about building our identity, career, relationships, and security. The second half is about going deeper, asking harder questions, and often dismantling some of what we built to find something more authentic and meaningful.

The journey from the first half to the second half often involves a crisis—what Rohr calls "necessary suffering." It's the uncomfortable space where our neat and tidy faith gets messy, but also more real.

Replacing Your 8-Track Faith with Something That Actually Works Now

When I hit 45, my faith felt like an outdated technology—once cutting edge, now obsolete. The certainty of my 20s had given way to a host of uncomfortable questions:

• Why do bad things happen to good people? (And don't give me the book of Job as an answer)
• What happens to people who never hear about Jesus?
• Why doesn't God heal everyone?
• Is it normal to still have this many doubts after decades as a Christian?

I found myself envying both the rock-solid conviction of new believers and the peaceful acceptance of elderly saints. I was stuck somewhere in the middle—too experienced to embrace simple answers, too questioning to feel settled.

What I've learned—and am still learning—is that faith isn't meant to be a frozen artifact. It's meant to evolve and mature, just like we do.

Hebrews 5:12-14 talks about moving from spiritual milk to solid food, a process that requires "training." That training often comes through the very struggles that make us question everything.

Faith for the Netflix Generation: Bingeing Isn't Always Best

We live in an on-demand world. We can stream entire TV series in a weekend, have groceries delivered in an hour, and expect immediate responses to our texts and emails. But faith rarely works that way.

The Bible is full of waiting: Abraham waiting for a son, Joseph waiting in prison, the Israelites waiting in the wilderness, the disciples waiting after the crucifixion. Faith and waiting go hand in hand, much to our instant-gratification frustration.

In Isaiah 40:31, we read, "But those who wait on the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint."

Notice the verse doesn't say they'll get immediate answers, quick fixes, or overnight transformations. It says they'll receive strength for the journey—which implies the journey continues.

When Tom, a 51-year-old accountant, faced the sudden closure of his firm and the financial chaos that followed, he expected God to provide a new job right away. "I had this idea that my faith meant God would swoop in with a quick solution," he said. "Instead, I spent eight months unemployed, burning through savings, questioning everything."

During those months, Tom started volunteering at a homeless shelter—initially just to fill time and feel useful. "I met people who had lost everything but still had this raw, authentic faith. No prosperity gospel, no expectations of easy answers. Just a daily trust that God was present in their struggles. They taught me more about faith than 30 years of sermons."

Tom eventually found work, but not before his understanding of faith had fundamentally changed. "I stopped expecting God to fix my circumstances and started looking for God within my circumstances. Huge difference."

When Your Faith Feels Like a Tamagotchi with Dead Batteries

Remember those digital pets that would die if you didn't feed them regularly? Sometimes our faith feels similarly neglected—once vibrant and interactive, now lifeless and unresponsive.

The solution isn't always what we expect. Sometimes revitalizing faith doesn't come through more religious activities but through rest, reflection, and reimagining what faith can look like in this season of life.

Elijah, one of the Bible's most powerful prophets, hit a major faith crisis after his showdown with the prophets of Baal. Despite witnessing an incredible miracle, he soon found himself depressed, exhausted, and ready to die (1 Kings 19).

God's prescription? Sleep, food, and a gentle whisper. Not more work, not more faith, not more effort—but rest and a reminder of God's presence in the stillness.

When was the last time you allowed yourself true rest? Not just physical rest (though that's important), but rest from striving, from performing, from trying to earn God's approval or figure everything out?

Jesus offers this invitation in Matthew 11:28-30: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Accepting that invitation might be the most spiritual thing you do this year.

Breaking Up with Toxic Faith (It's Not You, It's the Prosperity Gospel)

Some of our faith struggles come from toxic beliefs we've absorbed without realizing it. The prosperity gospel—the idea that faith equals success and blessings—has infected much of American Christianity, leaving people devastated when life doesn't deliver health, wealth, and happiness.

Then there's toxic positivity—the pressure to always be joyful, to find the silver lining, to never admit doubt or despair. This isn't biblical faith; it's emotional suppression with a spiritual veneer.

Scripture gives us a different picture. Jesus wept. David wrote passionate laments. Job questioned God's justice. Thomas doubted. Peter denied. Paul had a "thorn in his flesh" that wasn't removed despite his prayers.

Real faith has room for grief, anger, doubt, and questions. In fact, these emotions can be expressions of faith rather than its absence—they show we're bringing our whole selves to God, not just the polished, presentable parts.

When Karen, a 50-year-old elementary school principal, lost her husband to cancer despite countless prayers for healing, her church friends responded with well-meaning but harmful platitudes: "God needed another angel," "Everything happens for a reason," "God won't give you more than you can handle."

"Those comments made me feel like I couldn't be honest about my grief and anger," Karen said. "Like I was failing at faith because I wasn't accepting this as 'God's perfect plan.' It took me years and a lot of therapy to realize I could be furious with God and still believe in Him—that my anger didn't negate my faith but was actually part of a real relationship with Him."

Faith in the Age of Uncertainty: Embracing the Mystery

If there's one thing our generation has witnessed, it's the collapse of certainty. We've seen trusted institutions fail, moral leaders fall, economic systems crash, and "sure things" evaporate. Is it any wonder our faith sometimes feels shaky?

The good news? Biblical faith was never about certainty in the first place. The famous definition in Hebrews 11:1 describes faith as "confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see." Note that it's confidence and assurance, not absolute certainty or the absence of all doubt.

Greg Boyd, a theologian and pastor, suggests that faith is more like trust in a person than intellectual certainty about propositions. "Faith is not a matter of having everything figured out," he writes. "It's a matter of choosing to trust God's character even when we can't make sense of our circumstances."

That's the kind of faith that can survive the uncertainties of midlife and beyond—not a faith that has all the answers, but a faith that trusts the One who does.

Finding God in the Spotify Shuffle of Life

Maybe you started this article hoping for clear, step-by-step instructions to revitalize your faith. While I've offered some practical suggestions, the truth is that everyone's faith journey is unique. What works for one person might not work for another.

The key is to remain open and attentive to how God might be working in the particular circumstances of your life—even (and especially) when those circumstances aren't what you planned or wanted.

Remember how we used to hit "shuffle" on our CD players, never knowing what song would play next? There's a certain surrender in that, a willingness to be surprised, to receive what comes rather than control it.

Faith in midlife often requires a similar surrender—not a passive resignation, but an active trust that God is present and working, even when the playlist of our lives takes unexpected turns.

In 2 Corinthians 4:7-9, Paul writes, "But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed."

Notice he doesn't say we won't be hard pressed, perplexed, persecuted, or struck down. He just says we won't be ultimately crushed by these experiences. That's the promise we can hold onto—not that life will be easy or that faith will be uncomplicated, but that God's presence will sustain us through whatever comes.

Your Turn: The Comment Section of Life

If you've made it this far, you're probably experiencing some version of a faith struggle right now. Know that you're not alone. Every saint, every biblical hero, every person of deep faith has walked through valleys of doubt, disillusionment, and darkness.

What's sustaining your faith right now? What questions are you wrestling with? What practices or perspectives have helped you maintain or rediscover your relationship with God?

I'd love to hear your story. Connect with me on social media or email me at info@brownslife.com. Because while I've shared my insights and experiences here, the conversation is richer when it includes multiple voices—especially the voices of those who understand what it's like when life doesn't go according to plan.

Remember: faith isn't about having perfect understanding or unwavering confidence. It's about continuing to show up, continuing to seek, continuing to trust—even when, especially when, life gets messy.

And if you take nothing else from this article, take this: God can handle your doubts, your questions, your anger, and your pain. You don't need to pretend to be fine when you're not. Real faith has room for all of it.

A Prayer for When Faith Feels Like Dial-Up in a 5G World

Let's end with a prayer for all of us who are trying to maintain faith when life throws curveballs:

God of mixtapes and smartphones, of MTV and TikTok, of our youth and our middle age,

You've seen us through cultural shifts and personal transformations. You were there when we made our first profession of faith, and you're here now in our questions and doubts.

When life doesn't go as planned—when careers falter, bodies fail, relationships fracture, or dreams die—help us find you in the disruption.

Give us faith that isn't afraid of tough questions, community that can hold our doubts alongside our beliefs, and peace that doesn't depend on having all the answers.

Remind us that you're not intimidated by our anger, disappointed by our questions, or shocked by our doubts. Show us that real faith isn't the absence of these things but the willingness to bring them honestly before you.

And in those moments when we can't feel your presence or make sense of your ways, give us just enough light for the step we're on.

Amen.

About the Author: William Brown is a writer, small group leader, and former first responder chaplain who has witnessed faith tested in life's most critical moments. Having cut his teeth on MTV when they actually played music videos, William brings a Gen X perspective to the spiritual challenges of our times. With 25+ years of ministry experience focused on small groups and one-on-one mentoring, he's walked alongside people during their darkest hours and brightest victories. His years as a chaplain taught him that real faith doesn't avoid the trenches but finds God within them. Having weathered his share of unexpected life detours and faith potholes (including being run over by life's cleated boots more than once), he's become the go-to guy for Christians wondering if God's GPS is broken. When he's not writing or meeting someone for coffee and conversation, you'll find him enjoying fine cigars with friends and trying to find his reading glasses (they're on his head). Follow his authentic, occasionally bruised but never beaten faith journey at brownslife.com.